House of Hawthorne

The Roll-By Holler

Posted on: July 7, 2011

I spend a fair amount of time walking around, with the whole not having a car thing. I also spend a lot of time while walking pondering the behavior of drivers. What is about people in a car that makes you want to speed past a pedestrian? I remember the instinct too. “Darn this girl, walking around on her stupid legs.” I will always lose that race, anonymous drivers. I am not IN the race, actually.

There’s also this thing people, specifically men, in this case, do, where they will slow down, sometimes going out of their way to turn around and come back even and ask, “Do you need a ride?” Nope! I don’t need a ride. I am able-bodied and the convenience that would come from having a stranger give me a ride is well out-weighed by the danger that comes from getting in strange men’s cars. Thanks, though. I am good. Far be it for me to suggest that these men have nefarious purposes, of course. I’m sure they’re all fine-upstanding young gentlemen that can’t bear the sight of sweat on a lady’s brow.

Today I had a new (to me) experience. I was walking to the library (well, of course I was walking to the library) and a man of indeterminate age but let’s say, older than me, rolls by on a full on young person’s bike, if not a child’s bike and hollers, “Hey!” I did my best dismissive but not unfriendly nod.

I mean, I said, “Sir! Wait! Can I ride on your pegs? I see you have pegs. Speed me away to the library, which is 100 feet away. We can check out DVDs and hopefully My Sims Agents for the Wii and begin our new automobile-less lives together. ‘It all started with the pegs,’ I’ll say, fondly. Come back!”

That’s really what I said!

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4 Responses to "The Roll-By Holler"

“Nope, I don’t need a ride.I am able-bodied and the convenience that would come from having a stranger give me a ride is well out-weighed by the danger that comes from getting in strange men’s cars.”

That, and “nefarious”— bloggery gold.

Kudos to you for standing up for the merit of walking as a CHOSEN method of transportation, and also not hopping into strange men’s cars. Too bad, Billy Ocean. 😉 You’ll stay in his dreams!

LOL, Great blog, as a full-time pedestrian myself, I totally understand the random shout outs from people in passing cars, and in your case, passing bikes! LOL!

Oh funny. I love the ending of your tale. I can only imagine the face of the cyclist. I wish I had a bike with which to pedal my happy ass around. With a sweet seat for my child of course. Oh how rad-tastic would Dad look with his kid in tow rolling through the burbs. I think the hip life passed me by long ago. But a man can dream.

It is out of control that you are not a New York Times Bestseller at this point in your life, stop being so funny, i cant be spending this much of my day laughing at your observations!

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